Hitman: Hitting Men

I've still only gone in a couple of times. I need to get back to it, if someone will stop distracting me with Legacy speedruns…

I've completed Bangkok several times under two minutes (got as low as 1:47), but someone is inexplicably finding Cross' body. It's quite infuriating.

if someone will stop distracting me with Legacy speedruns…

Hey, don't blame me - that's your own competitive nature.

My problem with going faster so far has been avoiding catching Morgan's bodyguard as collateral damage.

I've got to give up for now. I have a route in mind, but the frustration from spending slightly more than my full lunch break hammering away at the same 2-minute loop to no avail is making me play worse. When I'm shouting "what the fuck is your PROBLEM?!" at a security guard who doesn't exist, maybe it's time to set the controller down.

I've got to give up for now. I have a route in mind, but the frustration from spending slightly more than my full lunch break hammering away at the same 2-minute loop to no avail is making me play worse. When I'm shouting "what the fuck is your PROBLEM?!" at a security guard who doesn't exist, maybe it's time to set the controller down.

… and that, dear friends, is the true art of the assassin.

Is this nuts? This seems nuts.

Yeah. That's about standard for these speedrun guys, though.

Fuck it, I'm done. If any of you can legit beat this, you're a fucking wizard.

[Album] Top 10!

World record is 38 seconds.

Yeah, but that uses wall-piercing sniper exploit wizard bullshit from halfway across the map. Hence, "legit".

Hokkaido run down to 3:35, and can't figure out a faster run than that; any more corner-cutting and I get bodies found. Again, the 35-second record involves wall-piercing explosions.

I've managed to kill both targets (and only the targets) and exit the level in 1:47 several times, but Cross' body always gets discovered.

If Cross wasn't dead within 25 seconds, I restarted the run. Morgan was the tricky one.

Been trying to come up with an approach on Colorado, but I just can't beat about 7 minutes, which is immensely frustrating. Can't for the life of me get a handle on the targets' routes.

The Fishy Business challenge pack is up now. Complete 6 fish-related challenges in Miami to unlock the Fishing Line.

Is that just a reskinned piano wire, or something else?

Yep, just a fancy fibre wire apparently. The challenges are quite amusing though.

God, there's so much stuff I still haven't done in this…

We need more Society contracts, too.

Warming to Sgail now. I love the way that it’s basically an entire island full of the most horrible people on earth so the normal Hitman rules of “minimise collateral damage” don’t really apply. Some of the challenges are hilarious. Throwing 47 people into the sea sounds like a fun way to spend a rainy afternoon.

The kills are pretty gruesome too. On my last run I

Spoiler - click to showburned one target alive and slammed the other into an iron maiden.

God, there's so much stuff I still haven't done in this…

We need more Society contracts, too.

Reading everything you guys are doing in this, the depth you're going into, basically makes me both hugely keen to get going on it and massively scared at even trying to start.

I need to make an effort, right after I'm done with Enter The Gungeon. It's next on my list.

Join us! It's fun!

I've gone back (forward?) to Colorado. I think I've managed to kill all of the targets at least once, though never in the same run. Blitzing through Marrakesh and Bangkok repeatedly has not prepared me for actual Hitman; I'm being incredibly reckless, basically sprinting everywhere, getting into gunfights and all sorts of shenanigans.

It doesn't help that there are basically no places where you can go without a disguise, and every section of the level needs a different one.

Yeah, it's a really hostile place. I think I've got a couple of ideas for a quicker run, but I've not been able to actually string them together yet. Rose is a pain in the ass.

Speed is not yet a consideration.

Had a few minutes to spare between work and cooking dinner tonight, so of course I had to give Paris a run.

Ugh, fine…

If you two keep up this level of practice, the next Cosgrove family gathering is going to be a bloodbath.

Maybe, but at least it'll be quick.

Colorado done, twice; very sloppy the first time, but relatively efficient the second - much less bank-and-forth at least. No clue how to get anything close to Suit Only, but Silent Assassin should be straightforward. Not sure why I didn't manage it that second time, in fact - two accidents, a drowning and a pistol execution with the body hidden.

Anyway, on with the Mastery…

Sapienza down to under 5 minutes (just); would be quicker, but can't seem to reliably hit the virus (or anything else) with a pistol.

If anyone can tell me how the hell this doesn't count as a Silent Assassin run, I'd be extremely grateful. I can see that I've lost the points for "No Noticed Kills" but I can't for the life of me see where.

Spoiler - click to showIt can't be for Zaydan, because I've poisoned him successfully before and still gotten SA, and Strandberg goes down in an accident. I thought, on an earlier run, that it was because someone became suspicious during my exit, but that doesn't happen this time.

I'm perplexed.

Sapienza down to under 5 minutes

If anyone can tell me how the hell this doesn't count as a Silent Assassin run, I'd be extremely grateful. I can see that I've lost the points for "No Noticed Kills" but I can't for the life of me see where.

If I had to guess (because the same thing happened to me on a Sapienza run and I can't think of anything else) - you exit the level before the "Unnoticed Kill" popup appears for Zaydan.

😑

Edit: it was the popup. Done in 4:31, which puts me 17th on the global board. Not much to shave off without a complete overhaul of the Zeydan execution, though.

Done in 4:31, which puts me 17th on the global board. Not much to shave off without a complete overhaul of the Zeydan execution, though.

You might think so…

https://twitter.com/Ninchilla/status/1084160610508652550

Basically the same strat, but I think my starting position and brazen approach to "avoiding" guards is what gave me the edge on it; video is uploading.

I'm a little surprised how much of a difference it makes saving that couple of seconds waking up the waiter - I guess the food just intercepts him at a slightly better point in his schedule?

Honestly? I don't know. At one point while I was working it out, I reloaded a save and he didn't even go for the food at all. For all I know, it's as much down to luck as anything I've actually done.

The video:

I had a reload with a similar issue - my suspicion is that because he's outside your sphere of influence and hasn't been interacted with, his loop starts from the beginning rather than where it left off in the save.

Hmm, maybe…

Tried a run at Sapienza this evening (/morning), but I cannot get De Santis in a reasonable timeframe. She's just never on her bloody own!

Rough outline:

Spoiler - click to showStarting in the mansion kitchen; poison the spaghetti, ring the bell, grab the crowbar next to the table to break into the bottom floor of the observatory; steal a biolab keycard, up the stairs and across the roof to De Santis' office; ?????; back down to the biolab where I've stashed a rifle, take it to the place where you use the dongle and shoot out the virus; escape by seaplane.

Spoiler - click to showI've blown her up, shot her, even tried a poison syringe, but in the event that I can get an Unnoticed Kill on her, the body is found shortly afterwards.

I think I'm going to have to re-examine my whole approach, which is quite frustrating.

My fastest time so far has been:
Spoiler - click to showStart in the lab; up to where the lone guard is, on the ledge, and shoot the virus; dash upstairs, poison spaghetti, and ring the bell; back down to where I shot the virus, and wait for deSantis to get downstairs; (try to) shoot her in the head as she crosses the lab roof, out of sight of anyone else; down the drainpipe, and exit via seaplane.
If I was a better shot, it'd be much faster, but I don't think there'd anywhere I could stash a rifle that I'd save time fetching it.

The Swan Dive trophy/challenge on Sgail is absolute bullshit. A completely unconnected series of things you need to do in a very specific disguise that you’d never ever guess by chance. Follow a guide if you want that one.

First successful Silent Assassin done on Colorado in… 28 minutes. All four with piano wire, to get that challenge squared away after the previous accidents-only run.

Suit Only will have to wait a long time - I've not even figured out how to get into the house yet without a disguise (though I also have a suspicion I won't need to…).

You're going to have to get into the house - the only exit is the storm bunker in the basement. GLHF!

Took a break from Legacy runs to explore the Isle of Sgàil this evening. Mostly just explored, but did also take out the targets (and got some Mission Stories/challenges out of the way as I went). There's still a lot that I have no idea whatsoever how to do, and I'm still utterly lost in the place, but I'll get there… eventually…

…I hope.

the only exit is the storm bunker in the basement

Isn't there a challenge to do with leaving on the quad bike?

Yeah, but you can only get it in Contracts. The only valid exit for the campaign mission is the basement

It's a very silly challenge but knocking ten people out with the frying pan while disguised as the chef in Sgail was unexpectedly fun. Turns out hitting someone with a pan isn't exactly quiet so you need to isolate your targets as much as possible. I ended up hiding on the stairs leading down from the kitchen area and decking people from a distance with the flying frying pan of doom, giggling to myself every time someone went down.

Revisited Marrakesh before trying for SASO on Colorado.

That's a totally different approach, I take it?

Yeah.

Spoiler - click to showStart in the embassy and set up the electrocution, jog over to the school, blow up a scooter to distract checkpoint guards, lockpick into the back alley for a disguise and lethal injection the general. I think stealing the APC keys might save a few seconds on exfil, but I didn't risk it.

I can't even remember where the APC keys are. Where do you get a screwdriver in the embassy?